The Five Types Of Friends You Don’t Want At Your Wedding

There are a couple that should be left out…for your sanity.

Weddings are always a big talking point in a young woman’s life. Not always, but the girls and guys that decide that marriage is for them. What kind of dress, how many people, and who is invited are always big dinner conversations while preparing for the wedding. So, who do you invite? How about the people that make you happy, and the ones that love you and your fiancé. There are a couple that should be left out…for your sanity.

The Negative Nancy

Girl, you know this one is your catty BFF who you kind of love, but obviously love to hate. This friendship should have died when double popped collars went out of style, but you held on like some people hang on to the acid wash jean trend. She may or may not have a significant other, but she is worse when she has her own relationship. Especially if she hasn’t gotten the ring yet. Nancy just can’t seem to let go of the fact that you are getting married and never going to hang out with her again. She’ll whine and complain about your fiancé taking all of your time. Although she may have her own love she still makes you feel like crap when it comes to your wedding. She’ll make passive aggressive comments and try to work herself into the wedding by saying things like, “I’m going to get so drunk at your wedding!” My advice about this one? Tell her your busy…forever.

The Non-Believer

Much like the Negative Nancy, the non-believer is just as terrible. I’m talking about a girl or guy who has lost their mind completely. They think that their way of life, the single life, is the only way and you are making a huge mistake. Excuse me, but I don’t judge when you sleep with three men in a weekend…in fact I applaud you. This friend says things like, “I don’t believe in the institution of marriage, and you’re dumb to get married.” To this, I say…do you, but you can’t sit with us.

Your Overprotective Guy/Girl Friend

Maybe you had a fling, you dreamed of one…either way, stay away from that train wreck. Why? Do I have to even…okay? If this person is invited, they’re going to get super drunk and try to punch your new husband/wife. Even if they are well-behaved, it will bring up all sorts issues with your judgemental friends as well as your husband or wife. In the nicest way possible, you’re an idiot if you invite them. Purely for the fact that past feelings aren’t appropriate on your wedding day.

The Girl Who Used To Talk Sh*t On You

You know the one, the girl in your sorority who thought that you were faking when you had to drop out of school due to being sick. She also told everybody that you had an STD and that you cheated on your boyfriend. No, she didn’t want him for herself, she just didn’t like you then. Now, it’s a different story. Apparently she’s changed. You saw her at your friend’s sister’s birthday party at a bar and she totally hugged you. You talked for like, 5 seconds and she apologized for sleeping with #3…the overprotective guy friend. Send that girl to charm school, because she isn’t any sort of lady.

You’re Ex-BFF/Kind Of Reacquainted

The girl that you got into a fight with about the stupidest crap and text when you look at old pictures of you two together. Figure your life out, because honestly…that girl only texted you because she heard you were engaged. Get real. Sit down, and realize the reasons why you cut her off in the first place. She doesn’t know you anymore, and she couldn’t tell your fiancé from some guy in the street. Do yourself a favor and reconnect completely (if you dare) after the blessed event.

It’s Hard Out There For A Bride

I could literally see my wedding dreams going up in smoke.

If there is a simple fact of life, this is one of them: Weddings cost money.  A lot of money.  So when I got engaged at 25 years old, I recognized that fact.  But I don’t think I comprehended just what weddings cost until I began to actually search.  And I should probably also mention that I am luckier than a lot of people my age.  I have two parents offering to foot the bill for my wedding.  But that is within a strict budget.

I do a lot of reading online about other people’s weddings.  I’m a female, it’s what I do, get over it.  I got in my head that I wanted to have my wedding at the Please Touch Museum in Fairmount Park (Philadelphia).  Then their wedding coordinator sent me an email.  I could literally see my wedding dreams going up in smoke.

I don’t know what you’re throwing in your chicken parmesan if you want me to pay you $250 to serve it to my family.  Do you make it with gold?  Does Channing Tatum himself prepare, cook, and serve my dinner? Because if you are charging me that much money per plate, after asking me to give you $5,000 to rent your hall, there had better be a Magic Mike reenactment somewhere during my reception.

After touring seven different venues, I finally found somewhere that gives me what I am looking for within my budget.  I then began to search for photographers.  Holy hell! Everything adds up quickly.  But, I should probably mention that I am not willing to compromise on this either.  I dabble in photography, so finding a good photographer is a top priority for me.  I’ve spoken to three different photographers to date, all with prices starting at $3000.  Let me try and get that past my parents.  I can hear them already… “Do you know what I could do with three grand?!”

Pictures are not JUST pictures!  They are all you have left from the day, pictures matter.  And trust me, I’ve seen some jacked up wedding photos.  I don’t want to be the memes that Kate laughs at later when she’s on her break from work.

But since the theme of Kate’s blog is shopping on a budget, I will also share the few savings I’ve had so far!

My venue is including flowers for our center pieces, and ceremony site, which saves us a ton of money to begin with.  But they also work with the same florist that we wanted to use anyway and they will give us 20% off of any additional flowers we order, so bouquets, boutonnieres, etc are discounted! Score!

Here’s another tip for those soon to be engaged: pay attention at any weddings you attend for vendors you might like. I’m choosing a DJ from a previous wedding that will offer us a photo booth and his DJ services as a package deal, and discount for a repeat booking.  Plus my brother-in-law knows his wife, so we’re hoping for a little magic there too!

Chic and Cheap Weddings: 103

After a long week of soul searching (and working like a dog), I’ve decided to write another post about weddings. It’s certainly a biggie: wedding favors, table linens, and veils

Alright, this is a short post, but important.

Wedding Favors

Girl please, most people will be too drunk to get the favor…(unless it’s a dry wedding…in which case, you need to get your priorities straight.) So, anyway, there are plenty of favors that are less expensive than the common ones. For example: food, bubbles, or flower seeds. Candy can run you a good $2.00 per candy, while flower seeds and be a couple cents, if you know where to go. I have gone to my fair share of weddings, and I will tell you my ultimate favorite favor: Nothing. THERE! I said it! Donate that money to a good cause…we all know your guests are more excited about their new profile pics and their drunken buzz than a package of *literally* terrible candies with my husband’s face on them.

Table Linens

Another ridiculous expense that most brides would be better without. Yes, your color scheme is important…and yes! the lace linens you saw ARE super cute…but literally, your guests are looking at you, talking about you, and taking pictures of YOU. I have never heard of a party-goer saying that a bride’s table linens were not “up to par.” Please, we all know you spent a fortune on a table cloth that your aunt dropped spaghetti on…and then tried to cover it up. Linens are the WORST. It is so easy to get caught up in that crap. Do me a favor (just for me, please!) Don’t spend extra on table linens. Most of the time, your venue will have a vast amount of choices that come with the price. Take those bitches for all they are worth!

Veils

Oh, lady! You are literally putting a piece of fabric in your hair for about 3 hours! You might want to make it interesting…for goodness sake, it’s your wedding! If you are anything like me, you want it to be traditional. I get that, I really do. Traditional is good! Don’t splurge for a veil. My advice? Go on etsy, ebay, or a pre owned shop. It will save your life…and your wallet (Which is super cute, by the way!)

That’s all for today, the holidays are getting to me! Oh, and I got published on Elite Daily! Check that baby out!! I’ll see you after Christmas!

xoxo -Kate

Chic and Cheap Weddings: 102

Take your seats and get your notebooks out, it’s time for another wedding chat. Last time, we spoke about photographers, wedding halls, dresses, flowers, and Pinterest avoidance. This time, we’re digging deeper into details. Rip off that band-aid, girl! We’ve got stuff to do.

I’ll start by talking about the smaller deets: Pre Cana (If you’re into it), Bridesmaid dresses and gifts, cakes, and save the dates.

Religious Training for Marriage

If you want your marriage to be recognized by your religion/church/temple (etc.), your significant other and you must attend classes in order to be well prepared for the sacrament. In my case, Michael and I must attend Pre Cana. To be honest, we’re fairly excited. We want to meet new couples that are just as excited and are ready to get married. The downside? That $150-$300 fee to take the class. Girrrrrl what theeee…?! I’m all for doing this right, but wow! That’s pretty hefty. This is something that’s non-negotiable. Especially if your religion is important. My suggestion for this one? Put aside the money down. Live on yogurt and PB sandies for the next week until your paycheck comes in. It will be over and done with. Better yet, submit the payment so you aren’t tempted to use it.

Bridesmaids

Sisters, cousins, and besties all will be gathered next to you the day of your wedding. You appreciate it right?! But where does the line get crossed? What is proper wedding etiquette when it comes to the bridesmaid dresses? What about gifts? If you are buying the dresses for your ladies, forget the gift. That is their gift. Bridesmaid dresses (if not shopped for appropriately) can be upwards of $400!! Going on sites like bridesmaids.com will be a lifesaver for you. Being money conscious for your girls is also a huge thing. Yes, that bridesmaid dress is perf, but the one of $99.00 is much better in your bridesmaid’s eyes. Please don’t start with the “but it’s my day!” crap. Yes, it’s your day, but those girls don’t HAVE to be next to you. Be kind.

As for gifts, make it personal. Make it you. Make it you and your bridesmaid. Stop with that expensive stuff! (Unless you get a phenom deal, then go ahead) There are plenty of things you can do as an alternative that your bitties will like just as much, like a welcome box with a bottle of wine, some gum, some cute (reasonable) earrings or a bracelet, and an adorable wine glass. Get your creative on. Your bridesmaids will appreciate your sentimental actions and be so much more excited to do things for you! (excellent.)

*This bullet also goes for groomsmen.

Cakes

We’re sailing into uncharted territory. This is probably the single thing I am avoiding while planning my wedding. I feel too much pressure! I like chocolate, but my family may not! My friends might hate fondant, and my family may hate buttercream! As if Pinterest wasn’t pressure enough, so many of my friends are shocked I’m not excited about this. Whatevs, I don’t like a lot of sugar! Sue me. Anywhos, my reception site makes the cake. Which is super convien. and makes me happy that I don’t have to go cake maker shopping. Ugh. For those of you that aren’t as lucky, make sure that you LIKE the taste of the cake. Make sure that the cake is a flavor that you and your fiance enjoy or agree on. After all, the cake is probably never remembered…with all that alcohol, right?

If you’re like me, look at alternatives. Although I’ll be getting a cake (as per my fiance’s request), cupcakes and a dessert table can be beautifully arranged.

Save the Dates

Make sure not to spend too much money on this. I swear, everyone obsesses over save the dates. I’ll tell you what I think: It literally sits in a person’s house, on their refrigerator (or didn’t even make it out of the envelope). Most of the time, the invitation is what really reminds a person. It’s a good idea to send out save the dates if a couple is getting married on a holiday weekend. Other than that, save the dates are frills that are fun to look at.

Tune in next time for the unnecessary frills that are never noticed!

xoxo- Kate

Cheap Weddings 101

Alright ladies and gents-
Let’s talk about it: *shudder*
Wedding Costs.

If you’re money conscious, like me, having a huge wedding is something you’ve always wanted, and are terrified of the thought of the amount of money that goes into planning and “throwing” a wedding. DEAR JESUS! That money though…

I got engaged in early July, and due to my white girl obsession with everything fall, I wanted a fall AND only a fall wedding. Obviously, it was too soon for me to plan my “dream Pinterest inspired wedding” in less than three months. We opted for next September. As an engagement gift, I received a binder from The Knot, aka the holy grail for wedding obsessed women. I obviously hopped right into wedding planning. For anyone in my shoes, or almost in my shoes, I’m gonna break down this realization:

“Well, weddings are fairly expensive, everyone knows that”

flip through first section

“Do you have to only pay for the reception place?”

flip to next page

“AND the church/temple/place to get married ?! WAIT HOW MUCH?!”

google cheap alternatives…then get yelled at by family for googling cheap alternatives

“Ok, soo the most expensive part will probably be my dress, the church, and the reception”

How much can photographers REALLY cost?

“Holy…”

Let’s just elope

**mother cries. You cry. Friends cry. Fiance gets wine for all aforementioned.

Ok, so we get it right? Right. Weddings are expensive. And I curse whoever made this a multi(probably)BILLION dollar industry. After watching my sister, brother, and plenty of friends get married, I’ve picked up a couple interesting tips that you may want to know about.

  • Your dress: Is it just me, or are there other people who think its crazy that you spend an immense amount of money on a dress that you wear once? On one hand, it’s insane, and you all know it. On the other hand, when will you wear something as fabulous again? Uh…what about a Tuesday? I happen to know that Lord & Taylor, Macy’s,Bloomies, and Neiman ALL have beautiful gowns, and some come in white. And some come in under $100. If you get my drift.
    • PS- My bestie got married in a gorg bridesmaid gown in ivory. Talk about a savvy diva.
  • Your ceremony: Depending on how you want your wedding to go down, there may not be an alternative to spending the cash to get yourself recognized…unless you have a friend and he/she can marry you. Then you’re in luck.
  • Your photographer: Your sorority sister takes sick pictures? Score. Get that bitty on lock for your engagement shoot. As for the wedding pics, shop around. Talk to photographers in your area. A cheap package can run you a couple hundred without the insane amount of frills they “add-on” to sell you on your own wedding day. You can do books and different size prints yourself. Snapfish or zazzle makes that stuff super easy.
  • Flowers: Check out alternatives for flowers. Broaches, dried flowers, sheet music (ok, that one is hard), burlap (for that rustic type of girl), beads, lanterns (if you want them to look like they live in Hogwarts), or even feathers. If you’re stuck on flowers, you gotta give and take a little. Maybe compromise. Have flowers in the ceremony and an alternative in your reception. Girl (guy), it’s your special day. Get it together.
  • Another tip: Get off the internet. Stop looking for alternatives for what you’ve already decided on. You’ll end up spending more money on MORE stuff you probably won’t use.
  • Reception Site: Night time wedding on a Saturday? Open that wallet a little more, please! Try a day time on a Sunday afternoon. Or a night-time on a Thursday…in January. The reception hall will be paying YOU.

Anyway, that’s all for cheap weddings 101. Tune in for my next ranting break-down about weddings in a week or so 🙂

xoxo -Kate